TLC has announced plans for yet another fatty show, One Big Happy Family, a reality show about a fat family being fat and trying to be less fat. The suits at the network are comparing it to Little People, Big World - you know, real nice folks ill-suited for the society they live in, their trials and travails, and...puke...I can't even finish the sentence. I'm no underwear model myself, and I don't have anything against fat people just for being fat. It's fat people who let their teenage kids plump up to a ripe 340 pounds just in time for prom then whine and play the victim card who piss me off. You're not "big-boned," and obesity is rarely the result of being dealt a losing genetic hand. It's the result of eating shit and sitting on your ass. You shouldn't get a show for endangering the lives of your children - you should get a visit from Social Services.
Everyone stresses out about "anti-oxidants" and "fatty acids" and "carbohydrates," crap our grandparents didn't even know existed, as if they're going to die of ass cancer at 47 if they don't get the numbers just right. Atkins convinced millions of self-loathing fatties - twice - that bananas should be avoided. When someone shows me a family of obese monkeys, I'll give that some thought. Potatos are evil? Tell that to the Irish. Entire populations of humans thrived for millenia without even knowing oranges existed, and we buy bottles of vitamin C by the case.
It never ceases to amaze me how stupid people can be about food. I know Sausage Egg McMuffins with Cheese taste good - hell, I'll probably eat one before the end of 2009 - but I also know that anything that contains products from three different animals, is shipped from 1000 miles away and still costs $1 probably shouldn't be a regular part of my diet. That goes for anything in a box that contains ingredients I can't pronounce. But I'm in the minority, I guess, because apparently so many Americans are fat fucks now that a reality show about other fat fucks seems like a good idea. On The LEARNING Channel, no less. If you're looking forward to learning something from this show, sell your TV, hang a mirror in it's place, then sit down and look at it for half an hour. End of lesson.
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